New Game: Make a wish

[OldSolduer]

You did.  And now the police have you:

I wish that tomorrow will be a snow day!  :snowman:

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TV When I say younger I mean late 20's and early 30's..... >

 

[vonGarvin]

\\

TV When I say younger I mean late 20's and early 30's..... >

Oh, I know.  Of course, the idea is to take your wish and twist it into utter despair for you ;D

 

[OldSolduer]

Oh, I know.  Of course, the idea is to take your wish and twist it into utter despair for you ;D

Didn't work.....you oughta know better !!

 

[navymich]

I wish that tomorrow will be a snow day!  :snowman:

Granted.  But then you wake up to find that you live in North Bay and are in the Air Force!!


I wish that divorces meant that ex's disappeared!

 

[JMesh]

Granted.  But then you wake up to find that you live in North Bay and are in the Air Force!!


I wish that divorces meant that ex's disappeared!

Granted. They now annoy and attack you while invisible!

I wish I could play trumpet as well as Adolph Herseth.

 

[RememberanceDay]

Done. This horse is amazing, this horse is strong, this horse is fast. You take it to Churchill Downs, to let it make a mock run. One of Ron Turcotte's grandchildren comes with you, to be the jockey. It explodes out of the gates, tears up the track. Your horse is just a givin'er down the final stretch, could it be? YES! 1:56.5 seconds, beating Secretariat's record by 3 seconds! However, as the horse is slowing down, it trips up, breaking 3 of its legs, one severely enough that it has to be euthanized.

But, hey. At least you got to beat a dead horse.

Aww... yer real nice. :evilrifle:

 

[JesseWZ]

I wish I could play trumpet as well as Adolph Herseth.

Granted, but while buzzing so furiously into your horn, your lips catch fire (friction) and severely burn the rest of your face. You are now horribly scarred, have no lips and can no longer play any brass or woodwind instrument... ever.

I wish that I had a rocket launcher.

 

[Newapplicant78]

Granted unfortunately you have a bad case sense of direction and point that baby to the ground, Pulled the trigger because you got spooked and sent your behind to the moon.

I wish I had a bad attitude

 

[Sigs Pig]

Granted:  http://www.badattitude.com/

But when the strings were tightened, seven ribs broke, punctured your lungs and you 'drowned'.

I wish the snow we are having would let up.

ME

 

[Sapplicant]

Granted:  http://www.badattitude.com/

But when the strings were tightened, seven ribs broke, punctured your lungs and you 'drowned'.

I wish the snow we are having would let up.

ME

Granted. Your wife now hands you the shovel.

I wish I could get Picaroon's in Ontario.

 

[vonGarvin]

I wish I could get Picaroon's in Ontario.

And so you shall.


Unfortunately, and unknown to you, the definition of "Picaroon" has suddenly shifted to mean "mange".  You go to the bar, oblivious of this fact, and there she is, the woman of your dreams.  You ponder, you pace, and then you work up enough gumption to go up to her.  You smile at her, and she smiles back!  You exchange pleasantries and small talk, warming up the quite obvious attraction you have for each other.  Then you lean in to her, close to her ear.  You can smell the wonderful scent of vanilla on her neck, and she feels your hot breath on her neck.  With eager anticipation, she leans into your lips, as you ask her:
"I'm going to get you some Picaroons".  Of course, you think you're telling her that you're getting her some sweet ale; however, all she hears is "I'm going to give you the mange". 

Disgusted, she recoils and looks at you as though you have gone insane.  With a quizzical look on your face, you simply ask her "What?  Don't you like Picaroons?  It's most satisfying on your pallet".  Now she has confirmed it: you *are* insane: why would you drink mange?

She gets up and leaves, and exclaims that you have just assaulted her.  The bouncers are on you in no time, and they toss you out into the street.  Feeling miserable, depressed and confused, you walk into the path of a passing Red Rocket streetcar, killing you instantly.  All that just for a Picaroons.


I wish my house would clean itself.

 

[agc]

Granted.  It works much in the same way my oven cleans itself.  The door locks and you stare hopelessly in the window as all your stuff is incinerated.

I wish this cold would go away.

 

[OldSolduer]

The cold will go, only to be replaced by malaria. >

I wish this freakin snow would go away.

 

[Ignatius J. Reilly]

Granted, but instead a powerful wash of acid rain will burn holes in one's shelter.

I wish my landlord would get around to fixing one of my storm windows.

 

[OldSolduer]

I wish my landlord would get around to fixing one of my storm windows.

This he does by boarding up the entire house AFTER he as tossed you on the street!

I wish it was warmer.

 

[Oldgateboatdriver]

Granted, but it was because the Nuclear power plant ten miles away just blew up.

You now live in a moon like desert.

I wish I had a drink.

 

[motox]

I wish I had a drink.

Granted.  Enjoy your Shirley Temple.  Unfortunately it is the last drink you'll ever have...

I wish I could return my opened bluray disk "Cop Out"...wow that was horrible!

 

[Nostix]

I wish I could return my opened bluray disk "Cop Out"...wow that was horrible!

Granted.

Unfortunately, your next blu-ray purchase will mistakenly contain a copy of "Stop! Or my mom will shoot!".

I wish I was no longer on hold with my ISP's Customer Service hotline.

 

[RememberanceDay]

Granted, but now they say that your stuff will never be able to be fixed, and will pay thousands in false repairs.


I wish I can remember my speech...

 

[Sigs Pig]

"I wish I can remember my speech..."

You did, but when you delivered it, it caused the room of AA members to run to the nearest bar to 'forget' and the government fell due to the fact there were no MPs present for the budget to be passed.

I really wish these house renos were completed...