The Military Police [MP] Superthread

[FastEddy]

[/quote]

I've never heard this one before.

Rectum Stretcher

While I was flying down the road yesterday (only 10 mph over), I noticed a cop with a radar gun sitting on top of a bridge.

The cop pulled me over, walked up to the car and asked me, "What's the hurry? "

I replied, "I'm late for work."

"Oh yeah," said the cop, "what do you do?"

I responded, "I'm a rectum stretcher."

The cop said "What is a rectum stretcher, and what does a rectum stretcher do?"

I said, "Well, I start with one finger, then I work my way up to two fingers, then three, then four, then my whole hand, then I work until I can get both hands in there and then I slowly stretch it until it's about 6 foot wide."

The cop asked me, "What the hell do you do with a 6 foot asshole?"

I simply replied, "You give him a radar gun and park him on top of a bridge..."

The ticket -- $95 dollars.

The look on his face, PRICELESS

Cheers. Note: The blanked out word is A..H...  .

 

[scouthern]

I'm entering my final year of highschool and I'm starting to plan my life out. I decided I want to become a Military Police officer (non-commissioned) serve for 4 years, maybe more, then switch to what I really want to do, become an RCMP officer. The RCMP has high standards and turns down a lot of applicants a year, as does the military. But I figured the Canadian forces is in higher demand then the RCMP. I figured Military experience would give me the upper hand. But then I saw the RCMP now recognized MP status for their lateral program (basically transfer). So I would skip the selection and training and just become an RCMP officer. Now I looked at what I need to accomplish this and it's about a highschool diploma and a police foundations diploma at an accreditted post-secondary institute for me to be considered as an MP. It doesn't give much insight on what else you require for experience or academics. But it does list dedication, courageous and good moral character are required (as with any public service job). So I no longer have to shoot for the stars in Uni as that wouldn't do be much better and considering my grades won't be up to par for it. I figured what could give me the upperhand in becoming an MP after my college diploma if I were an existing CF member as a primary reservist? I would apply at the end of my grade 12 year and be a reservist while going to college, would that better my chances for MP?

Thanks,

 

[lennoj]

Just a friendly FYI for you scouthern: The RCMP is recruiting rather drastically now and for the next 3-5 years I am assuming (baby boomers are retiring or going into security consulting). Meaning everyone else is moving up to fill those gaps so they need new young guys much like you. 

Goto college, receive your diploma in law and security or police foundations or even goto UNIV and pursue a criminal justice BA. By obtaining those pieces of paper will not only help you in your pursuit of becoming an MP, but it also gives you the necessary exp. points for later on (below). Have you tried calling your local MP reserve unit? It just might open up a few doors for you after college/univ.

Now for the experience points – former MPs are highly sought after by these rather large consulting firms to conduct TRAs, BCPs, and etc. When you release, and as long as you have those precious 5 years of experience or more behind you, you will have X number of points towards any MERCs contract which you are on the tenture for in the bidding process. I believe the standard for gov’t consultant is $1000/day.

Put some thought into what you want to be doing in say 10-15years, people change and needs do as well.

Good luck,

PS.

So I no longer have to shoot for the stars

Shoot for them

 

[Pelorus]

Why don't you apply to all three?  The RCMP, the CF, and to colleges offering police foundations programs.  Lots of possible paths that can all lead you to your end goal. 

 

[dimsum]

PS. I don't think there is a MP reserve unit in BC. All I've seen is Field artillery, engineer, and infantry that are located near me.

11 MP Platoon - Victoria
12 MP Platoon - Vancouver (Richmond)

 

[CBH99]

I would say your best bet would be to give the unit a call and ask them directly.  Or, call your local CFRC or call the 1-800 recruiting number.

If your trying to join an MP unit in the Army Reserve, it might be best to ask that unit directly for their exact entry requirements.

 

[RCDtpr]

Just so you're aware.....a buddy of mine just finished at Depot and he said there were more than a few 19 year olds there.  I'd apply to the RCMP while you're in school.  Even if you don't get hired what's the worst that happens?  They tell you to come back in a few years and when you return you will know what to expect in the hiring process.

 

[lennoj]

I've been trying to find a website or at least a phone number of the 11 Police platoon in Richmond, no luck yet.

http://www.12servicebattalion.com/mp_pl.htm (Richmond - Scroll down for contact info)

When you fill out your CF Application, on the last page there is a part that asks for your premission to submit your application / information to the RCMP. Check yes.

Good Luck

 

[lennoj]

Thanks for finding me the link. But when I click on requirements it just gives me the basic requirements for primary reserves. I assume if I apply at 17 I won't require the same eligibility status as a full time member (college diploma?)

Talk to the recruiter - no one here is privy to give that information.

Cheers,

 

[Franko]

scouthern,

You already started a thread on this exact same topic.

Do a search on the site, there is plenty of information here...don't start another duplicate thread.

The Army.ca Staff

 

[YYC Retired]

IMHO, Go the Reserve route... The RCMP, like any police agency, will want you to have life experience and would be unlikely to hire you straight out of school. So, after having served as an MP for a few years and with some luck a tour under your belt.... Apply then. As far as transfers across go you would have to do about one month in Depot to learn some RCMP specific SOP's......

As someone else mentioned, you can apply while at school ..... what's the worst that can happen???.... They say you should try later....?

Yes, they are really wanting to hire a lot of poeple right now.... Good Luck.

 

[medaid]

The PRes MPs ARE uniformed and DO carry weapons pending on duty types. However, unless they're posted to a domestic duty position along side their RegF counter-parts they are not armed on a regular basis.

I would NOT suggest applying to any Policing agency unless you have a) quite a bit of community involvement read volunteer experience b) quite a bit of work experience and c) a good credit history all if not most of which can be obtained till after your initial 2 years of post-sec. Also, education is really important these days. You will not likely fair well against 25yrs olds who hold a BA or BSc or even a Diploma, plus quite a few years of work experience and steady background. I'm not saying this to discourage you, rather think about it seriously. I've also met 20yrs old members but most of them come from extraordinary backgrounds. Those who have graduated high school early, obtained their diploma while working a full time job to support themselves. Things like that.

Another way of getting good volunteering experience while geting police work exposure is volunteering with the RCMP Auxiliary program in your local detachment. Again, this program requires maturity, and that usually means age.

Don't try to find any more MP PRes info on google. Go into CFRC Vancouver and your local MP Recruiter at the unit. You've got all the info you need. Now show initiative and get to it.

 

[medaid]

If you re-read my post, almost everything that I said stressed on Age and Life Eperience. That's why I said applying now to any of those above mentioned things will not get you far. With the exception of PRes MP. Go talk to them. NOW. Don't dilly dally.

 

[Inspir]

Another way of getting good volunteering experience while getting police work exposure is volunteering with the RCMP Auxiliary program in your local detachment. Again, this program requires maturity, and that usually means age.

From what I've been told the RCMP really disapprove of you using the Auxiliary program as a stepping stone to join the RCMP regular force.

 

[medaid]

Inspir, then you better tell over 60% of the Auxiliary members that their services are not welcome or appreciated. As long as you do your initial 2 year engagement with the Force as an Auxiliary, they rather welcome you to step up and become a RM.

 

[rocksteady]

Inspir, then you better tell over 60% of the Auxiliary members that their services are not welcome or appreciated. As long as you do your initial 2 year engagement with the Force as an Auxiliary, they rather welcome you to step up and become a RM.

Agreed.  You may not even have to do the full 2 years...

 

[Dissident]

That sounds like a recruiting question. You know who are really good at answering those? Your recruiting center.

 

[lennoj]

Okay, just had some minor surgery done on my lower back. I'm going to drop in the MP recruiting centre on wednesday (once I'm able to sit for long periods without pain) a question popped up. My physical requirement training for the PRes wouldn't be immediate correct? I'd have to go through selection process etc medical first and such? I won't be able to do anything intense for at least 3 weeks. But I want to talk and then apply before school starts. Is this a bad move? Should I wait till I'm 100% healthy? I'm not wheelchair bound or anything, it's just the phys testing will have to be put on hold for me till the end of august.

Typically, you goto your initial contact. If the recruiter thinks you will fit into the unit, he/she will then give you a letter of recommendation stating such. You take this letter to your local CFRC and then fill out your application, your security clearance and reference forms(Remember: Birth Certificate, I.D., High School Transcripts, and anyother piece of paper that may assist you). They will send it off for processing.

If everything comes back a-ok you then will recieve a call with imporant dates such as CFAT, and Medical. Do not cancel these unless if your grandmother dies. If you successfully complete these tests and the medical, you then will go back to your PRes recruiter for your final interview.  At which time you may learn the date when you go to your first BMQ weekend.

The process time of your application can be anything from 2weeks - 4 months.

So to answer your question - you will have time to rest your back, but be forthcoming about the injury or surgery. Honesty always prevails.

Good Luck and Rest Up,

 

[lennoj]

No. I am an ordinary civ.

I have a LLB with roots in employment law, and I currently hold a civ position within the DND. I am only a keener when it comes to policy.

With what is stated above, common sense could lead you to what I actually do and as pop-eye said: "I knows what I knows"

 

[medaid]

Almost all of us who've replied to you are serving members and a few of us have worked in Recruiting. Funny how you haven't taken any of our advice and speak directly to your CFRC or the gaining unit directly yet. So, so much for what serving members have to say eh?