posted this already, but totally in wrong section, I appologize. Any way. I want to go to the regs, but the wife has a major problem with it. Have been forcing myself not to go for about four years and I keep telling her " no, your right I guess, ya I won't go" even though she knows I want to. Lately though I'm having a tuff time with it. Any way, question, is married life in the regs as bad as she thinks it will be? Any tips for how I can make her come around?
married life in regs
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As we like to say in the regs - "wives come and go, your career will always be there for you." A good training wife can help you not make the same mistakes in the future! 
Seriously though, nobody in an online forum can answer these questions for you.
Seriously though, nobody in an online forum can answer these questions for you.
not sure where you live, what she does for a living or how your lifestyle is now, but life for the wife and kid in the CF can be both tough and very rewarding. I grew up as a base brat, my mother stayed home with me & my sisters. It was tough when dad was away, when we had to move, especially to some less desirable places, but I don't think mom would trade it for anything else.
She met the best friends she ever had in her life, saw more of Canada & the world than anyone she grew up with. Currently I have a girlfriend who is also apprehensive about the whole military thing. I am in the regs, and I do understand where she's coming from. If I am posted somewhere, she will have to give up her job to come with, that can bet tough. If I were to go overseas that would bother her greatly. The only thing I can suggest is what I have done, I take her out with me & my military friends. She has met and become great friends with my pals & their girlsfriends/wives. It helps I think if she sees & interacts with the human side of the military. She has sort of joined the family. I think your wife may also be dealing with fear of the unknown, we all deal with that now & then.
If she does have a job that is easily transferable that helps, nurse, teacher etc.. They need them everywhere. My girlfriend came with me to Oklahoma when I was posted there on exchange, she's a nurse, made more $$ than me there. It hurt her more coming back to Canada that me It really depends on your individual circumstances.....
She met the best friends she ever had in her life, saw more of Canada & the world than anyone she grew up with. Currently I have a girlfriend who is also apprehensive about the whole military thing. I am in the regs, and I do understand where she's coming from. If I am posted somewhere, she will have to give up her job to come with, that can bet tough. If I were to go overseas that would bother her greatly. The only thing I can suggest is what I have done, I take her out with me & my military friends. She has met and become great friends with my pals & their girlsfriends/wives. It helps I think if she sees & interacts with the human side of the military. She has sort of joined the family. I think your wife may also be dealing with fear of the unknown, we all deal with that now & then.
If she does have a job that is easily transferable that helps, nurse, teacher etc.. They need them everywhere. My girlfriend came with me to Oklahoma when I was posted there on exchange, she's a nurse, made more $$ than me there
. It hurt her more coming back to Canada that me It really depends on your individual circumstances.....
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One can be married in the regs and have a happy, worthwile relationship.
But the only question that matters is if you can be married in the regs.
I can't give very much input for you without knowing more about your situation, but spending 4 years telling her you would not go while you were thinking about it either means you were not that serious, or that you excluded her from some very important planning.
You'll have to make your own decisions, but you are welcome to tell us more.
Good luck.
But the only question that matters is if you can be married in the regs.
I can't give very much input for you without knowing more about your situation, but spending 4 years telling her you would not go while you were thinking about it either means you were not that serious, or that you excluded her from some very important planning.
You'll have to make your own decisions, but you are welcome to tell us more.
Good luck.
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cp, in order for you to be happy with your partner in the military, you have to love the military way of living.
I agree with Hauptmann, damn hard if you don't have the mindset. It kind of grows on you over time and then you become a member of a very special family.
Good Luck in what your future brings.
I agree with Hauptmann, damn hard if you don't have the mindset. It kind of grows on you over time and then you become a member of a very special family.
Good Luck in what your future brings.
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Communicate...it's the only thing that matters in a military marrage.
If she already has misgivings about you getting in, it'll only get worse if it's left unresolved if you do decide to get in.
Try to dissuade her fears and listen to her. It's possible that most of her fears are based on preconceived notions and nothing more.
Get her to come on this site and get her to ask the questions as well. There is nothing better than for her to get the answers for herself.
My 0.02 donkey dollars worth.
Regards
If she already has misgivings about you getting in, it'll only get worse if it's left unresolved if you do decide to get in.
Try to dissuade her fears and listen to her. It's possible that most of her fears are based on preconceived notions and nothing more.
Get her to come on this site and get her to ask the questions as well. There is nothing better than for her to get the answers for herself.
My 0.02 donkey dollars worth.
Regards
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