The Best Pranks and Practical Jokes...

[SharkSlayer7.62]

Living in close quarters, we tend to make a few friends and a few enemies. Life can get a bit monotonous and needs a little livening up. One of the common ways is a little prank here and a little joke there. What is the best that you have heard or done? I'll go first...

On a six month NATO deployment there was this one sailor who had it coming, don't really need to get into the details. One night in foreign port, while all the boys in his mess were out celebrating a birthday, I took the liberty of securing his locker shut by drilling a couple of self-tapping screws through the top, hex head of course. When they all staggered back from the bar, he couldn't get his locker open. All the boys were laughing their arses off and buddy had to get a wrench from the stokers to get his locker open.

I have also had my locker flipped upsidedown while I was on leave during the same trip. That was a nice surprise!

Lets hear what the rest of you have...

 

[Sig_Des]

somebody who had a penchant for flipping peoples beds, stuffing mattresses in lockers, etc. Definitely had it coming.

He leaves for the weekend. His desk and bed were completely taken apart.....and then put back together, inspection ready, 45 degree hospital corners on the sheets, in the bathroom across from the urinals.

His name was then taped to the bathroom door.  ;D

 

[Devlin]

Didn't happen in the Army world but good nonetheless.

Working pipeline construction in Northern Ontario a few years back and had oen of the bosses kids from university with our crew. We each had our own rented pickups to use for the duration of the job. Well it seems our little friend liked to go whining to Daddy about the guys abusing vehicles and using them to tow their own trailers etc.. rather than stay in hotels.

It got to the point of ridiculous when he started bringing up people's mileage at breakfast meetings. For what it's worth no one was really all that high in mileage or wear and tear for that matter.

Well junior get's loaded drunk one night and can't drive his truck back to the hotel.

One of the guys takes his keys and get's him a cab and sends him on his way.

We then take his truck to the grocery store and buy some nice fresh rainbow trout, remove dash, insert fish, re-install dash. And the nice guys that we were we even dropped his truck off for him at the hotel and brought him his keys the next morning.

About 2-3 days go by and he is driving everywhere with the windows down and quite the collection of air freshners on the go. For love or money he could not figure out where the stink was coming from (remember this is a rather hot summer in July). About 4 days in to this every morning he would have to remove the cats that were gathering in the box of his truck trying to get in at the rotten fish.


Lesson Learned: Don't screw with the troops or you will be sorry...

 

[SharkSlayer7.62]

The rotting stinky fish in the truck is a classic, well done!

Another good one happened to my boss. We were having a hanger party on the Montreal, and one of his friends poured three boxes of cereal in his cart. Coming back down for bed, he was surprised when he crawled in. He bundled up his sheet with the Corn Flakes and All Bran, brought it down to our mess and dumped the cornucopia of crunch into one of the other electrician's carts, thinking it was him. Buddy was so drunk that he ended up sleeping in it. There was cereal all over he deck.

Now that's what I call breakfast in bed!

 

[medicineman]

A couple of guys in my Evac Platoon in 89 got back at our sister platoon in Wainwright one year by planting old salmon and oysters in their heater hose one night, and topped it off by pissing in it.  Of course, everyone but them sould smell it.

Morning parade, we all fall in, 1 Evac all by their lonesome with 2 and Amb Pl a judicious distance upwind of them - the CSM andRSM were losing their minds and we were singing "Fish heads Fish heads, I love fish heads..."

MM

 

[GAP]

Camp Pendalton has a variety of critters, and one of these is the rattlesnake. Generally during ITR, we just had fun flipping them at each other, etc., if they bit you, you got a beesting type of swelling, but generally that was all. Until we short sheeted a guys' top bunk, inserted 2 rattlesnakes, and came back to barricks late from the field. Everybody was so tired, we just grabbed a shower and hit the rack.

Imagine, lights out, last guy (by design) comes back from the shower, drops his shower shoes, climbs into his rack. A little bit of rustling, and moving around, then all is quiet for about 2 minutes. (an eternity if you are waiting and trying not to laugh). A high, shrill, girlish screech, squeak of springs and a resounding thump as troop and mattress hit the floor. 

 

[X Royal]

Back in the late 70's there once was a OC's driver who had a habit of pulling many practical jokes. (ie: placing a raw egg in the toe of your boot over night ect.)
Paybacks are a b*tch.

SIT:
  On field EX in Borden. Relaxed situation. Most jr's hanging arround after breakfast waiting for the days activities to begin.
(OC's jeep parked on two rut trail.)

Maj. - Lets go "Bloggins"

They hop in the jeep & head for main camp. Proceed about 50 yards than turn 90 degs. to the right at which point all 4 wheels depart the jeep.
Some how someone had all the lugnuts in his pocket. ;D ;D

='s, 1 pee'd off major for his driver failing to first parade his vechile.

Crap Happens