Parent Problems

[Rider12]

Hi Everybody, I'm new to the boards. I'm 16 and want to enrol in the reserves soon, I have gone through the many stages of preparing (touring the local regiment, picking trades and PT). The only problem I have is with my parents. If I ask my Mom, she says that it is a loser job and that I will probably recruited into the Regs. When I ask my dad, he says pretty much the same except that the people there are lowlifes. I am really angry with all of these views and am equally angry that I can't get either of them to budge. I want to get in the reserves by the summer to get employment that I enjoy (as opposed to McDonald's or other **** like that). Any Input would be great.

Thanks

PS- I have done a search and came up with some answers but not quite enough for this situation.

 

[muffin]

If you are old enough to join without parental consent than you can just go ahead.
If not - unfortunatly you will have to either get your parents to see your point-of-view or wait until you are old enough.

It is tough when your family doesn't support you - especially if you live at home - but if it is something you really want to do then don't let your parents talk you out of it - you will regret it later, and you will not be living with them forever.

muffin

 

[MethylSilane]

"Lowlifes", eh?  I work with some of the finest human beings that I've ever known in the reserves.  In their civvie jobs, they're students, lawyers, teachers, stock brokers, bankers, tradespeople, police officers, accountants, computer programmers, factory workers...the list goes on.

My exposure to the reg force, while limited mainly to courses, is a similar picture, with professionals who have dedicated their lives to something greater than themselves.

The fact of the matter is that your parents are scared to death that something awful is going to happen to you, and in truth, it is possible, even if you never go overseas.  My advice is to sit down and discuss the facts with them, and frankly, to ask for their support.  They'll never be happy with your decision, and if they're like a majority of my friends and family, they will never understand it.

Failing that, your 18th birthday will arrive eventually...

 

[Rider12]

Thanks very much for the responce guys. I know all my parents spout about the CF is insults and lies. Its just very difficult to make them understand. I tried to get my dad to an info session with me at a naval reserve division but he won't go. All he says is that, "it's a waste of your life" or "if you go, you will never have my support again." Oh well, at 18 I go whether they like it or not. I just hope I gain some approval before then.

Thanks again

edit: spelling

 

[pinkbug]

MethylSilane said it quite well.

I actually had the same problem with my parents. My brother joinned and he then quit. So when it was my turn to make my career decision .. they of course had a saying. But if they don't want to listen to what you wish to do with your life .. your best deal is to suck it up until you're 18 ( like I did ) and then join and make your country proud.

Today, both my parents are proud of what I have become. But this is something that comes with time.
One thing to keep in mind. Don't join to prove a point or to try to impress someone. Join because you want to. Because you have something special to offer.
Then the rewards will be awesome.

Best of luck.
Hang in there.

 

[cplcaldwell]

Pink bug has an important point, make sure this is does not become a point in your life that you will save up so that later you do something to prove a point.

Remember this can be a dangerous job, it's not so much the 'bullets flying' part, as it can be the 'jeep rolling over' part. It's also a hard life from time to time, it's cold and wet and dark.

Your parents might be expressing a fear that they have not yet been able to identify, the fact that their child wants to become part of an organization involved in a very rough trade.

It may not be so much prejudice on their part as it is expression of an un-named fear (for you).

There's lots of jobs, even a few vocations, if you're lucky, you will only ever have two parents, and they won't last for ever.... go easy on them... at worst you'll have to learn how to agree to disagree... and perhaps teach them the same in the process.

 

[Red 6]

Your parents will come around. It just takes time and everyone has a dream of what they want/hope their child will become. It sounds like yours had something different in mind for you. Be patient and positive in your desire to be what you want. A big part of their views derives from stereotyping and lack of knowledge. Only you can live your life.

 

[Remius]

Hey, why don't you invite them to come down to the recruiting centre with you.  Sit down with some of the staff there.  They can talk about their experiences, reserve or reg.  Plus, meeting some CF personel might change their attitudes.

Just a thought, plus it let's them know you want to keep them involved.

 

[Rider12]

Hey, why don't you invite them to come down to the recruiting centre with you.  Sit down with some of the staff there.  They can talk about their experiences, reserve or reg.  Plus, meeting some CF personel might change their attitudes.

Just a thought, plus it let's them know you want to keep them involved.

I have done something similar to that. When we were at the PNE in Vancouver, BC, the CF was there and we talked to a number of soldiers, sailors and airmen. Lots of them had some great experiences and stories to share. We talked to a few Naval officers who shared how they got their education paid for through the reserves, the benefits and good experience. Heck, one of them even asked if he could grab me some info on joining if I was interested. But of course my parents declined and after we left I got one of those big speeches that it's a bad job and full of partiers.

Too add, I wanted to thank everybody for all their help. I can't tell you how beneficial this thread has been to be.

PS- I'm very sorry if I'm sounding like a gloomy idiot

 

[safeboy43]

Hang in there, old buddy. They'll come around soon enough. In the meantime, keep preparing.

Cheers

Your Friend Twitch

 

[SoF]

The only problem I have is with my parents. If I ask my Mom, she says that it is a loser job and that I will probably recruited into the Regs. When I ask my dad, he says pretty much the same except that the people there are lowlifes.

Lol I think your parents and my folks would get along great ;D I had the same problem as you except I was 17. They wouldn't budge either so I waited till I was 18 and didn't require their stupid consent. That may just be what you'll have to do if they wont change their minds

 

[kincanucks]

Jesus wept do we really need another thread on "I want to join but my parents/girlfriend/boyfriend/whatever, doesn't understand me"?  Do a search this subject has been beaten to death.

 

[safeboy43]

He did mention this at the beginning of the thread.

Cheers

PS- I have done a search and came up with some answers but not quite enough for this situation.

 

[tlg]

My dad keeps on telling me what he's going to do with the insurance money he'll get when I die. My mum thinks I'm going to commit suicide, but since I don't acknowledge her as a person let alone a mother, I don't recognize her comment as being anything but garbage. Then again I'm 20.

 

[Cloud Cover]

My dad keeps on telling me what he's going to do with the insurance money he'll get when I die. My mum thinks I'm going to commit suicide, but since I don't acknowledge her as a person let alone a mother, I don't recognize her comment as being anything but garbage. Then again I'm 20.

If it helps, you can leave the insurance to a good cause, like , oh I don't know ... the army.ca mess fund. 

 

[tlg]

I've been debating on whether or not to send it to Taliban Jack or I dunno, I think the Navy could use it to help with getting some new boats. ;D