Having Difficulty With Getting Ready To Go Over

[Freerider]

I am on Task Force 1-10. I have been training in Pet for 7 months now. As the training continues I am lashing out more and more at closest friends and family about the most trivial things.

Everything seems to be setting me off and I haven't even gone over yet. My boyfriend has been taking the worst of it. I can imagine it is difficult for him. He is a civi and I am military. Odd female / male scenario.

Is this common? To add to the stress of it all I am getting really frustrated with any kind of affection. I don't want to be cuddled or told that some one loves me. It all drives me nuts.

Any suggestions would be welcome. If "talk to the padre" is one of the suggestions I am hesitant for I like to keep my issues to myself or anonymous.

 

[dapaterson]

If you aren't comfortable talking with the padre, are there other peers or superiors you would feel comfortable talking with?

Stress is a natural reaction.  Talking it over with folks who have deployed before may also help - talk about what they went through, how they felt before deploying...

In short:  by posting here it's clear you're trying to reach out and find someone to talk with.  Look around your immediate circle and try to find someone you can share your stress and concerns with.

 

[vonGarvin]

I am on Task Force 1-10. I have been training in Pet for 7 months now. As the training continues I am lashing out more and more at closest friends and family about the most trivial things.

Everything seems to be setting me off and I haven't even gone over yet. My boyfriend has been taking the worst of it. I can imagine it is difficult for him. He is a civi and I am military. Odd female / male scenario.

Is this common? To add to the stress of it all I am getting really frustrated with any kind of affection. I don't want to be cuddled or told that some one loves me. It all drives me nuts.

Any suggestions would be welcome. If "talk to the padre" is one of the suggestions I am hesitant for I like to keep my issues to myself or anonymous.

Now, I'm not a padre or psychologist or anything; however, I have dealt with both pre and post tour stress.  I have reacted in a similar fashion as you.  Here is my free advice:
Talk to someone, do what dapaterson said:

...try to find someone you can share your stress and concerns with.

There are things I haven't told my family, because they wouldn't understand I feel that they wouldn't understand.  Military Padres are good, especially those who have deployed.  I know of one in particular, who is still in Pet.  PM me and I can send you his contact info.  And no, they won't go on about joining his or her respective church.  But the one of whom I am thinking has seen their fair share of "stuff", and can relate.

I hope this helps, for what it's worth.

 

[Teflon]

The avoiding of affection etc during the build up to deployment happens to alot of people (myself included) and is often refered to as "distancing". (So the head space and timing people have told me) Some do it as a subconsious defence mechanism to make the departure easier (how well it works in that regard would be different for every person) or a part of the process of getting one's "game face on" so to speak. For a period before for deployment/long exercise I find my temper and tolerence with my loved ones short as my mind prepares it's self for a prolonged period surrounded by the military enviroment and after the deployment it takes me some time to adjust back as unlike at work, at home I'm not a WO with my nice and unquestioned or debated spot in the chain of command and have to slide back into the whole partners in life mindset again